It's time to mumbling alone again~~~
Time flies~~~
Life needs to continue no matter what!
So stress now again due to my studies~
Even I don't know how to cope with it!
Haiz... Hope everything will eventually become better soon!!!
*Pray hard*

我又回来咯～～～

好久没有更新我的部落格了！开始有点想念这种自言自语的时光。
反正也没人在读，没人在看，没人关心。
就当作自得其乐吧！
也好，可以让我在这小小空间发呆，写写日记。

Who am I?

I really don't know what or who am I to you now. Even others' girl friend, a game, a news in the newspaper or anything can be more important than me! I'm sad and stress. Yet, no one really cares! No one really care who am I or what I am. What ever happen to me, just be it. Even though after accident also no one cares about your feelings, how you feel or did you hurt, injured or shocked. This is my current situation? I don't know how to discuss those complicated feelings inside now! Should I leave? Should I just leave all things behind? Start my new life? Forget about these bad stuff. I always tell myself, this is only for a short while... After all, the situation worsen and now: IGNORANCE. I don't know how long more I can stand this! I'm usually not the type of person but this time, I really do hope there will be changes on HIM.

Long time din post blog...
Insomnia again! Dunno y even with him here!
I also forget when is the last time I insomnia!
Me being weird!!! Totally emotional!
Am I demanding too much?
Am I too stressed?
Have I being hurt too much that day?
I dunno the answer! How I wish someone will!
I dont know what am I wishing and waiting for?
I dunno what I want now!
I just wish to cry loud under the rain!!!
Just like that! The usual me!!!
Who tends to hide all my emotions!!!
Who not willing to depend on others!
Who loves rainy day!
When she can run and play in the rain!!!
But, secretly drop her tears with them!
And pretend nothing happen and SMILE to others~~~
How I wish to get the little girl back!!!!
Please come back!

原来我什么都不是！

现在，咖啡成了我最充实的寄托。

每天一杯咖啡;

咖啡因的化学作用，

让我有一丁点儿的怀念。

I've changed a lot~~~

I'm so surprise when I, myself found that!!!

Attitude, emotion, frantically everything surrounding me!!!

I don't know why and when I've done so.

Maybe it's because my life is no longer alone, no longer single...

I've to deal with HIM, my special one!

One thing I can't accept the most is:

I CARE FOR HIM MORE THAN MYSELF!!!

He said I shouldn't be.

But, I really did and I meant it!

That's how jealousy and all come...

I want him to be mine!!! Only belongs to me!

I want him to spent time only for me! Not others!

I want him to care for me and etc etc etc...

I've turned to be selfish!!!

I hope I can change it!!! Please accept this ME!!!

cuz I still love you, my heart remains the same!!!

I knew you've tonne of problems. I knew you're stressed too. I knew. I knew.

But, why you just don't want to share them with me? Don't trust me? Maybe you just don't want me to worry?

Anyhow, your condition now is making me worry that my spines are all cold from top till bottom. I'm so worry about you now. Can you just share your burden with me? Tell me what happened? What is bothering you? Just don't let me guess, k?

You always don't like me to think so much. But, do you know that you're the one who make me think so much!!! I don't know how to rephrase it. Just "YOU"! You are the one that will cross my mind each time! Even you are unwilling to share your problem with me, I'll try to guess or try to figure them out by my own thinking. How stupid I'm?!

I just don't know how to help you! So helpless being there watching you suffer from a reason I don't know and yet can't help at all. You know how does that feel?

Why I want an IPAD?

Ok, I'm half computer illiterate, actually! So, I can't post a nice and "multimedia"-like post like others did. But, I did rather write it!!! Why I want an IPAD?

1. Weight

It is much lighter than my laptop, surely. For a girl that need to travel or always rush to classes in the biggest government university in Malaysia, UMS. I think an IPAD will surely make her life better without need to carry her laptop all the way to chase bus or worse still, walk!!!

2. Size

IPAD is just the idea size for a girl's usage. It can be fitted into any handbags or bag without problem as it is just the size of a book or even smaller and thinner than some. LoLx...

3. Screen size

Its screen is bigger than the galaxy tab or can be said almost the biggest among other tabs and etc. So, it is easier for reading or viewing especially for one who is having both short and long-sightness problem (with specs).

4. Convenience

Based on the 3 points stated above, an IPAD really create lots of convenience to me!!! That I can chase a bus without extra "KG"s, suit for my reading of books, assignments and so on, can put inside all my bags without trouble, for me to online anytime at anywhere, for me to see even without specs(coz can be zoom) and etc....

5. Facebook

People say teenagers mostly can live without facebooking... So do I! So, IPAD will definately ease my problems that I can on facebook and so do I can update or get updated from time to time!!!

6. Blogssss

Besides writing my own blog, I can even check on the http://www.lukeyishandsome.com/ blog more often from time to time and get updates about him, his surroundings and the world. Not forgetting others blogs as well as they really "update" me.

7. Speed

For ur information, my laptop is fantastically slow especially online as it had a rather bad or slow ram that can't satisfied my need for speed and it move on "tortoise"-like speed that always make me frustrated. With an IPAD, I'm sure this problems can be solved easily. So, I can surf the web better and get info I need for assignments and so faster... Yahoo!!!

8. Finance

I've always hope to get an IPAD for myself since long but I'm having big financial problem. Imagine, having RM3500 each semester with more or less RM1000-1500 deducted for tuition fees at university and a few more hundreds for hostel and deduction of RM500 each semester for the first RM1500 sent through cheque for university 1st time registration fee, how much left? RM2000. Now they wanna deduct processing fees and insurance fees as well.... It is less than RM2000 for approximately 4 months usage!!! It's not even enough only for food, except that I eat grass and drink rain water with occasionally some biscuits and maggi once in while. How about my daily needs such as shampoos, soap, and so on. No forgetting I'm a girl that need to buy extra stuff for my monthly "aunty's visit"! So, I really can't afford for luxury like IPAD!!!

9. Remembrance

The creator of the IPAD, Steve Job had just past away. I would like to keep one of his production as well. The other products are all expensive. Thus, this will give me a chance of getting one of his production. Thanks to Lukey!!! Furthermore, it is a powerful and useful gadget for me! *p/s: RIP Steve Job!

10. I'm a human too

Most human especially Malaysian like free stuffs given away, so do I! Thus, I would like to win this IPAD to be mine as well for the above reasons... Forgive me for being greedy since I've already got a laptop, Amen!

11. Games...

I'm a fans of angry bird and other games!!! Sure I would like to own an IPAD for my games... How nice if I can play ANGRY BIRD with it~~~ *DREAMING*

12. I WOULD LIKE TO ADD THIS!!! TO SAVE THE WORLD!!!

Maybe some will be wondering how an Ipad can help to save the world? ==

I would explain here!!! Because it will cut down usage of paper in total which I can use it to view my journals, newspaper, notes and etc etc which before this, I would use hardcopy = paper. So, with an IPAD, definately the tonnes of papers I may need to use to print the above stuff can be saved for other purpose and this will save our timber as well... It's now an emergency, not only please... But, a must! People, do something to save our earth! We only have 1 earth. The 1 and the only!!!

Anyone can join this contest to win an IPAD either you're a friend of LUKEY or not! Just click on http://www.lukeyishandsome.com/for more details and get yourself a chance to win an IPAD~~~ Gambateh!!! ^^

If I leave you now, how would it be?
If I don't be with you in the beginning, how would it be?
If I don't fall for you at all, what would we be?
If... ...

Many questions poped up in my head recently. I don't know the answer and don't feel like knowing one! Maybe I really think too much nowadays or maybe the way you act makes me think so?! I just hope we'll remain as that! Nothing change so I don't have to readapt to the new environment again! My feeling and I are both fragile~~~ I hate this ME!!!

1st class

Had my 1st class of my 3rd year 1st semester. Not a very good one but not bad either. Hope it it will be better in time~

Published with Blogger-droid v1.7.4

Night of loneliness...

Night where my mind can think clearer?

or vice versa?

I don't know!

I just realized that whenever I'm alone,

I'll think of you!!!

You're always there in my mind!

Blocking my senses to other things,

make me only think of YOU!

How special you are to me now!!!

I'm wondering~~~

Questions~

What is responsibility of being an adult?

What is responsibility?

Do people out there know about their responsibility?

I did say I only know a part of it in which I' trying to fulfill them!

Some people may not!

They don't even know what is manners and etc.

They just think they are the best and what they do is supposed to be correct!

Actually, this is what we called "SELFISH"!

Because of your own benefits, your greediness, your self-satisfaction, your own "good deed",

You may bring along harms to those of your surroundings...

Do you know what is the most important thing in our mother earth?

It is "relationship" built naturally between human = RESPECT

Respect is given by people based on how they judge us and our attitude!

Respect is given, not asked for...

However, some people just love to cause troubles, arguements...

I hate these and these kinds of people...

Everyone has only 1 chance to live,

why can't we make it peaceful and harmony?

Aren't this is better?

Recently I found that your temper is being worse.

Is it because of me or your workload is bigger than before?

Stress causes that? Or influence by me?

What so ever, I just hope it changes for good!

Anyhow, I forgot to congratulate you! Sorry for that!

Hope you’ll always maintain that!

My emotion is getting worse each day from now~~

I unable to control them well nowadays in which the reasons remain unknown!

Is it because without you by my side? Or I think too much?

I don’t know!

The only things I confirm now is:

I MISS YOU~

I truly miss you so much, my dear!

I don’t know whether will you ever see this!

Just want to let you this!

p/s: I love you~~~

Thanks to my dear!
I've few days of satisfication in the mid of exam!!!
Really stress before this!

Hehez...
It's all gone beyond the 9th clouds now~~~
Yahoo~~~
Waiting for the last 2 paper and off I go!!!

KUCHING, I'm coming!!!

Last day of April...
Erm...
Let's re-flash!
What I've did in April?
Seems things I've done most = wasting time~~~
Haha...
April is almost the middle of a year,
yet I seems have done nothing really beneficial yet.
Seems I'm wasting life, huh?
Or I'm enjoying life instead with some non-academic based activities!
Maybe!
Just take it easy!
Treat everyday is a brand new day and enjoy the breathe as it is your last breathe.
Make everyday count!
Your life will definately be more beautiful,
eventhough you may have done nothing but just "breathe"....
So, just enjoy life till its fullness like I always does~~~
Every difficulties you meet in life is a test, but not exam in institutes.
Remember this and you'll not be stress during exam!
Enjoy exam, Kayne~~~

Maybe I'm not pretty,
but I'm caring.
Maybe I'm not hot,
but I'm kind.
Maybe I'm not rich,
but I feel satisfied.
Maybe I'm not clever,
but I'm happy with it.
Maybe I'm not perfect,
but I've a heart~~~
That love you!
I love you with my heart,
my whole heart!!!

-------> ♥

Dear, please don't get so stress o~~
I understand that you really scare you can't do good in your exam,
but there is no big deal with it!
Just to let you know:
I'll be by your side no matter what!
Sad to see you being so stress out and force yourself to an extreme!
Take it easy! Relax a bit, recharge and go for it!
I'm sure you can make it!
I've faith in you! Trust me, trust yourself!
Just do your best, leave the rest to GOD!
Love you~~

14 weeks of lectures = past
1 week of study week = current
3 weeks of exam = future

What a nice Sunday!!!
But, having quiz tomorrow plus passing up an assignments!!!
Need to pass up 2 lab reports on tuesday!
Having my FINAL EXAM in 2 weeks time!!!
Then, Finally~~~

IPOH, I'M COMING~~~

And before that,

SARAWAK, I'M COMING~~~

Life here in Sabah = harsher and more stress
Life at home = free and yet boring

Which kinds of life you prefer?
I do not know about myself but can't help in complaining~~~
I'm so so tired of these!
When will this hectic schedule even be lesser?
I'm done soon!!!

Haha... Add oil!
Few more assignments + exam = FREEDOM + TRAVELLING!!!